Welcome to the 2022 Cinema Club Golden Corn Awards…

Another year of film, & for the first time since 2019 we had a full year of cinema viewing, which was so lush. Only interruptions were personal life & stuff getting in the way of going to the cinema. We didnt quite reach the 100 club but we did 86 trips to the cinema in 2022, which considering is still a remarkable achievement. As well as streaming some epic movies & TV shows (old & new {JUSTICE FOR OBERYN!}) & DVD’s weve really been spoilt for choice this year. & as much as we moan how many different places there are now for us to get our content from, its been nice to pick what i want where i want & this will be so much fun in 2023 too. So yea you know my drafts are still full (although i have written & spoken a lot about movies in 2022) but this is always the thing i look forward to typing up the most.

So what happens at my awards (if your new here which a lots of you i know are), well there is no actual award. Ive never made one to hand out, & they arent the most conventional awards either, if youve been here before you know the randomness of this. But some of these films wont be recognised in award season, so im here to make sure they bloody well are, for all the right & wrong reasons. We have our main awards too, which will culminate in the presentation of the golden buzzer winner & therefore the Cinema Clubs Film of the Year for 2022.

So lets press on shall we. 42 awards in total to hand out & give to some deserving winners. Peoples, Besties & Lovies are we ready, welcome to the Popcorn for One Cinema Club Awards for 2022…..
Ohhh spoilers by the way, thats your warning here. This is now your own fault if you see something you didnt want to know about.

42) My Moment of 2022
James Gunn & Duncan Jones & Fit Cinema Guy
So lets start with the obvious 2 here. Getting Tweets likes & responded to is always nice when they get picked up or viewed. The besties at Letterboxd often do this, which is nice. However getting it from 2 of your 3 favourite film directors is always amazing. So thank you very much for the retweets & likes James Gunn & Duncan Jones. It made my days when that happened.
& Fit cinema guy, at cineworld brighton (a few of you know about this) i will see you again & give you my phone number. Your help & flirting & love of star wars has been amazing (also shout out to the girl who used to make my cinema coffee order i miss her too) But yea fit guy, i miss you.

41) Did I Predict 2022 Correctly
Hell Yes
Of the 32 films that appeared on my hit/Wishlist for 2022, i missed 6 of them. yea 6. 5 due to being pushed back to 2023 (including the number 1 pick which was a shame) & the other one ive missed, was added to prime in November so ive just not got to it yet. So yea i got that right however out of what ended up being my top 5 most anticipated films of the year, only one of them ended up in the top 10 for the year.

40) The Number of Films I Considered for the Golden Buzzer in 2022
4, but if i hadnt hit it, it would have been 5
Other than the films that came 1st & 2nd (which will both be awared later, the other contenders for this award were Belfast, Phantom of the Open & it would have been the Menu, but id already hit my buzzer at that point, but it was worthy of a contention.

39) Film Place I’ve Visited This Year
Everywhere in My Policeman
So My Policeman we knew was filmed here. It was all the Buzz that the Styles was in Worthing & Brighton & Seaford & Littlehampton. We were all on the look out for him. So watching that film was like playing bingo ticking everywhere off the list. & then i lost my crap. Theres a recital scene, & its in my bloody local cinema. I have say on those uncomfortable seats. I had a major freak out & watched that scene several times screaming no fucking way. HARRY STYLES HAS BEEN TO MY LOCAL CINEMA!!! & its instantly recognisable that its my cinema, if youve been there you know.
Also you wait ages for a film to made where you live, & then 3 comes out in 4 months typical.

38) The Film We Didnt Actually Need in 2022
Nan The Movie
15 years to late, & would have worked better as 3 30mins tv shows in the lead up to comic relief on tv. It showed how dated it was & how awkward it was. As kids it was fun to watch nan, but now as an adult it was like nah no more. The only reason worth watching it was to donate some money to charity. Id have preferred to send them £10. Next year i will do that instead.

37) The Dullest Film of the Year
Emily
The highlight of this film was the guy when he scanned my card & went ha your names Emily & you are seeing Emily, oh & when the priest acted like a manic pixie dream girl & dropped a bit of smutty writing on the floor. I know im not a period drama girl but no. That was dull & boring & even the line of duty guy didnt keep me gripped. Not for me sorry.

36) Any Freebies?
The Summer of Loyalty at Cineworld (also who sent me Din)
Cineworld for 6 weeks did a you go see a film with your card, we will give you a freebie, which i didnt know about until i went to go buy some popcorn. I got coffee, drinks, sweets & popcorn for free. It was so much fun.
I won a Grogu this year that was cool too. However if you are the person or company who sent me the helmetless Din with Grogu, please come forward. Id love to thank you. It brilliant.

35) Animal Performance in a Film (In Honour of the Swan from Hot Fuzz)
Jenny The Donkey
Yes the first big award of the show goes to Jenny from The Banshees. Everyone in their life needs an emotional support Donkey & i cried a lot. I really did. She was lovely & brilliant. I mean the dog in that film was too, but it wasnt Jenny. Give her a Bafta.

34) Best Remake / Reboot
Top Gun Maverick
100%. There were once again a lot of films that tried to reboot or get the nostalgia right but none got it as right as Top Gun Maverick did. & i think being one of the highest grossing films of all time makes its point that it came out at the right time & had the right tone.

33) The Film I Will Never Look At The Same Way Again
Rogue One (due to Andor)
You ask me on 1 September are you hyped for Andor, my answer is no but ill watch it & see how it goes. The second it was over 10 weeks later i felt like id lost apart of me. It hurt. So i watched Rogue One afterwards & had a completely different viewing experience & enjoyed the film, even more than i already do.

32) Best Performance in an Otherwise Crap Film
Pedro Pascal (Twice) WW84 & The Great Wall
This is not Pedro bias. I repeat THIS IS NOT PEDRO PASCAL BIAS!
By the time these are posted the world will be in love with our manic pixie dream baby girl, because he is being used correctly in something. However in 2022 i watched both Wonder Woman 1984 & The Great Wall for the first time & the only person who acted well in either of these mess of films, was Pedro. The mans got range & can salvage anything. He is the only reason to watch these films & that is a profession opinion. I mean WW84 even didnt use Pine correctly.

31) Worst Home Viewing Film of the Year
The Stranger Inside
Never randomly flick the channels when you off & watch crap films. That was what this film. It was atrocious & i never want to think about it ever, ever again please.

30) Animated / Children’s Film of the year
Matilda or Strange World
Matilda was incredible it really was. So inspirational & had me as a mess. But is it a kids film, well yes & no. Tims songs make it so much more than that. So if you want pure Kids its got to be Strange World. I adored it & im very upset it didnt end up in my top 10 films of the year. Its amazing. Please go watch it on disney plus peoples, you all missed a cracker.

29) Mis-Sold Film of the Year
Where the Crawdads Sing
So i still dont know if Crawdads sing or not & it wasnt as cool or stylish as everyone made it out to be & the taylor swift song i was expecting to be throughout not just the end credits. Im sure the book is better but nah it didnt deliver on the hype or the trailer. Not for me

28) The Film That I Liked That No One Else In The Entire World Did
Fantastic Beast The Secrets of Dumbledore
I mean i am a sucker for Jude & Mad & Jude & Mads having that sexual tension was like ooooh my its rather warm on this April evening. Eddie was amazing. It was such a fun story, we went back to Hogwarts, shit went down. I loved every second of it. & i know not as many people went to see it as the world though, but ive been promised a wizarding war, i want to see that please. HOGWARTS IS MY HOME!

27) Worst Cinema Club Film
Bodies Bodies Bodies
There had been hype about this for quite a while & i went to go see it as an advanced preview going oooh im gonna tell everyone about this. Oh god! It was bad it was so bad. It wasnt funny it wasnt scary, Lee Pace was the best thing about the entire film. It was a waste of my evening, it really was. I mean ive seen 2 body horror films in the last year & they were better than this. It was a waste of time. Look something got to win the award right.

26) The Film I need to see in 2023 the most
Oppenheim
If you expected anything else you clearly dont know me. In Nolan I Trust! I mean its stacked. Its got these two mesmerising trailers. Murphy looks amazing. I just cant wait. A Nolan film is always going to top my must watch list, no matter what. The day it doesnt, means im probably dead or really unwell.

25) The Film I need to see in 2023 the most that was on last years list
MI7 Day of Reconning P1
It was last years number, & im still hyped for it. So i had to mention it. Its a travesty if i didnt.

24) Quote of the Year
$10mil to whoever shoots this Ken Doll in the head & The Entire Paddington 2 Scene
Yep this is shared. I couldnt not pick between them. There was also a Bar scene in the Adam Project which was considered & then a moment in another film thats won another award.

So the actual quote about Ken Doll, is crazy as the film came out 3 days after the picture of Ryan Gossling as Ken for the Barbie movie was released. & i laughed so hard so so hard. Good on the Grey Man hehe.

Now you know my love for Paddington 2, if you dont GET OUT RIGHT NOW & GO WATCH THE FILM! Okay now youve caught up, when Javi G stood there in the unbearable weight, & looked soft & said Paddington 2 was his 3rd fave movie of all time i feel apart, & so did the rest of my cinema. & then the fact its proved. & then the call back at the end… Whenever people now tell me they have seen Paddington 2 & its incredible, i reply with I FUCKING TOLD YOU! & the whole wanting to be a better man, i feel that Javi G, i really do with your curls & soft puppy dog eyes.

23) Best Song in a Film
I Aint Worried by One Republic for Top Gun Maverick
With the beach American Football scene is amazing but it is an absolute banger of a song. I listened to it at least twice a week last year for the summer. Its pure perfection & is such a tune without the movie or that scene. I mean it helps but yea its epic. Ryan Tedder you legend.

22) Cried When I Should have
Tea & Sugar metaphor in the Phantom of the Open
I knew there was going to be a point in this film that would reduce me to tears, & it was this moment. I mean i dont have sugar in my tea but still, that got me. & i was a mess for the rest of the film. This was the other quote i was thinking of for the earlier award.

21) Cried When I Shouldnt have
The Mitchells v the Machines, maybe I was meant to but that dad talking to his daughter really bloody got to me
Yea that broke me. I have a good relationship with my parents but i know some people dont. & watching those breakdowns in communications & falling outs & remembering what it was like to be a teenager & falling out with people, that bloody hurt. I was sick when i watched this film, but oh god i cried at it. Behold Cinema…

20) The Person I Cheered When they were Rightly Put in their Place
Tom Hanks in Elvis
Imagine me saying that at the start of the year. I know people have their issues with his performance, but for me to dislike the man i call the GOAT that much means a lot. So when Elvis started getting his own way at points, it was brilliant. I was like yes go Austin, go go go. It was incredible viewing.

19) The Person I wanted to Punch in the Face for being such a convincing Bad Guy
Chris Hemsworth (Spiderhead) & Chris Evans (The Gray Man)
Both bankerble hero actors, who both played villains who had moments where i really wanted to scream at them on my TV. I kept trying to separate them but i just kept thinking about how they were so both so punchable in different ways. How dare they how bloody dare they. Both made sense in there bad ways too. So yea they can split this award.

18) The Film that didnt Match the Hype
Dominion
Dinosaurs arent my thing, & i thought well theyve got everyone back for this so lets see. & apart from Jeff being Jeff & Sam Neill getting the turn around intro with the music, i cant tell you what else happened in this film. I really cant. I know people adored it & loved it but it just didnt connect with me. Im sorry, it did not match the hype.

17) The Film The Exceeded The Hype
Top Gun Maverick
It was number 21 on my hitlist for the year & kept getting delayed & it was like ahh this is another nostalgia moment film made as a cash grab… oh god no… oh bloody hell no… its special, its very special.

16) The best Ensemble / Cast Performance
The Menu
Perfectly cast, everyone from the extras to the customers, to the main people in it. Ralph & Anya & Nicholas were outstanding. It just so worked & im not sure it would have worked as well without all those people being in it. It just worked & everyone was on such form.

15) Best Actor
Colin Farrell
I mean i am a founding member of the Colin Farrell deserves a fucking oscar fan club, & he bloody does. Phenomenal in the Banshees & Batman. I mean im not seeing The Whale until after this has been published but Fraser has really got to go some to beat him, because there was no fault with that performance at all. In years to come people will as about The Banshees just for him. Its outstanding. GIVE THE MAN A BLOODY OSCAR!!!!!!!!!!

14) Best Actress
Emma Thompson
From Leo Grande to Matilda, plus other bits of hers ive watched across the year, Emma can do no wrong. & i was shocked when i realised id never given her this award. I mean the two films ive mentioned are polar opposites & she bossed them both. I love here & she is queen & always deserve to win every bloody thing.

13) The Wow I didnt know they had it in them to do that Performance
Jason Isaacs
First of all Hello to Jason Isaacs, second i knew he was a brilliant actor. However if you have not seen the film MASS, please do. Its heart-breaking & when he has his freak out & emotional breakdown half way through it hurt. It hurt so much & i sobbed with him. It was beautiful.

12) Surprise Film of the Year 2022
The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent
The film i went to see an advanced preview of to tell you all to avoid it & how they would misuse Pedro once again in a movie… & then i laughed & sighed & fell in love with Javi G. Im even willing to get over imaginary Nicky. Its hilarious. I saw it twice at the cinema & i toasted in my birthday with them in the film. If this film doesnt make you smile, im not sure whats up with you.

11) DVD Film of the year
The MCUAthon upto the end of Phase 3
Last January i decided to watch the MCU upto the end of Phase 3 in order & i did. & it was fun & it bloody hurt when it was all over. I mean theres probably been better films that ive watched on DVD, but it was sooooo much fun & i was a spent when it was done. Its well worth doing peoples, trust me.

Right Here we go people the Top 10 Awards of the year. Some Major Spoilers coming up im sure here, heres another warning for you. This is now your own fault

10) Best Random Recommendation from the Letterboxd Community
The Outfit

After i gushed about the Phantom of the Open i had 6 people message me going please watch the Outfit you will love it, you like these kind of films. Most people were from Letterboxd who sent me that. So thank you all very much (we will touch on this again in a min).

9) The Inspirational Fuck Me Thats Stunning Moment
Andor (mainly episodes 6 & 10) yes i broke my own rules

I watched a lot of films in 2022, a lot of films & a lot of TV & yet episode 6 of Andor was the best visual display holy fucking crap moment ive seen captured this year. That sky is so beautiful. It made me cry & then the two speeches in episode 10, fuck me. I mean no offence to the speech in episode 12, but i kind of expect that, but wow, just wow.

8) The Leonardo DiCaprio Award for Hard Work & Perseverance
Mark Rylance

Phantom of the Open, Bones & All, The Outfit. Truly the star in all of them. He is very quickly gaining to get into the Ruffalo Category, below Hanks as GOAT reserves. I dont think ive ever given a film the mans been in less than 4 stars. Truly remarkable & to have 3 completely different roles this year, yea hes very very special.

7) The Film that hasnt won an award but fucking deserves an award for being amazing
The Adam Project

For a very long time this film was winning first time watch of the year. It just connected to me. I smiled laughed cried & loved the story & the twists & the acting. It just made me feel so much. I had a blast watching it & i made my sister watch it the day afterwards & she (a huge Reynolds fan) was like ooooh god. yea it works on so many levels.

6) The Life Time Achievement
Robbie Coltrane

We lost some legends this year but this hurt the most. The fact the year started with him saying on the potter anniversary, I wont be here but Hagrid will, it made me cry. & then for him to longer be here at the end of the year, yea i cried a few tears that night. I did i really did. A huge part of my childhood, in Potter, Bond & Cracker. What a man Robbie Thanks you so so much

Right this really is it now the 5 that really really do matter

5) I Stole the Show
Rocks with Googly Eyes (twice)

all of Everything Everywhere was outstanding, but the scene with the rocks made so much sense & i loved it & then for the Googly eyes later on was just amazing. & then 3 months later Rise of Gru what turns up a pebble with Googly eyes & then… Michelle Yeoh!!! I was the only person laughing in my screening of that film obviously no one else had made the link. & from that moment those rocks have won this prise. Crazy but epic.


4) Unsung Heroes
George & Julia for saving RomComs

How to work out that you are old, when you say they dont make them like that anymore. Yep they dont make RomComs like they did in the late 90s early 00s. But Geroge & Julia’s chemistry in Ticket to Paradise was amazing & yes it was cliche, but it worked & they singlehandedly saved the RomCom in one movie. Also a realistic showing of beer pong. I loved every second of it & i knew how it was going to end, but i didnt care. I had a blast & it was amazing. So yea they are the cinema heroes this year.


3) First Time Watching film of the year
The Outfit

Yea this crept in at the last minute. Phenomenal. It was just oooooh my god. Everyone ive seen since i saw this film at the start of December when thye have asked ahh what should we watch, ive replied with The Outfit, Go Watch It Now! in a shouty tone. It was so clever & it bleedingly obvious but oh my is it good, it is sooooo good. It is one of those films thats just crept under the radar & is so clever & special. Seriously the best recommendation of the year & if id have seen it in the cinema probably would have come 5th on my list of the films for the year in total.


2) Cinema Film of the Year
Everything Everywhere All At Once

Watch this film on as big a screen as possible. Seriously you have to. Visually a spectacle. The Score amazing. The script solid. The Acting, phenomenal. It is such a trip, but i think about this film quite a lot & go ahhhhhhh. Its really stayed with me & im glad its stayed with the proper people to & is getting recognition at awards season. Its one of those films that a once in a blue moon & i get that its not everyones cuppa tea, but its soooooo mine it really really is. I adored it, & it probably was the best piece of cinema in 2022, but it didnt win…

& Finally the crowning glory the award you have all been waiting for
1) The Golden Buzzer & Winner of Cinema Club 2022’s Film of the Year is…

TOP GUN MAVERICK

If you expected anything else, you clearly havent followed me in the last year at all. The film that i added to the watch list as an ahh okay that might be cool, had no expectations for, another waste of time nostalgia trip. FUCK NO I WAS SO WRONG! Seeing it twice in Screen X was amazing watching that plane fly over the top of that building at the start. it throws you back in the chair at 270c. How they made it was just omfg. The throw backs didnt feel forced. Everyone acted amazingly. The tension & the drama just so crazy. Tom proved hes still got it. The music, the score, the danger zone. All of it & VAL FUCKING KILMER!!!!!!!!! Seriously if this isnt in your top 5 films of 2022, what did you not like about it. I took my parents to watch it & they went wow. My sister watched the first film before seeing it & then went wow. Its seriously so cool & has one of the best Act Threes in modern cinema. Its a triumph & the world bloody adores it. Right place, Right time, Feel good movie, that everyone loves. Thats what Movies Bloody Should Be!

& that was the 2022 Golden Corns.
Cinema Club 2022 is officially closed & we are already on our way in 2023
Thank you for reading & listening in the last year & putting up with the tweet-a-longs & Stanning & even if youve just skipped to the end of this thank you. I really do appreciate every single one of you for the time & effort you put into this madness.
I hope youve found some films here that youd like to watch that you didnt know about (& maybe a few to avoid). Please enjoy the year of film 2023 is going to be, its going to be epic. I mean my watch list wrote itself for once.
Now off to the cinema you pop peoples (unless its a Monday between January & March you are reading this, in which case Joel & Ellie need you & i need an iced coffee & a hug), its award season after all.