There are no spoilers here we know what happens. This review has almost taken a year to write as well i just keep adding to it, & not wanting to publish it so thanks for being so patient guys.

Thank god for Sky Cinema having an Oscar channel showing all the greats, however i do still love my mums sing along addition we got her, its amazing. But when its on Sky every day you can watch it in bit throughout the week, also as you know what happens it means you dont miss anything. So im going to try & do this in order, and try not to find too many plot wholes in this classic. Because thats what it is an all time grate, i will make my kids watch this. So lets start from the very beginning a very good place to star…

The hills are alive with the sound of music what an opening song to a film like seriously what a song. The swiping camera going over all of the mountains to then just pick up Julie Andrews spinning around it’s just amazing. It should be celebrated more than it already is. & then she leaves her whimple & has to go back for it character in the one 90sec song is fully set up we all now know everything we need to about Maria & that she’s going to boss it.

I do miss the fact that modern films now often don’t have an opening credits like that some do but there’s usually so much going on. Be nice just to have some random backdrops (doesn’t have to be Austrian) with all of that happening & not have to pay attention to the plot. Maybe that’s another reason I love moon so much. 

The nuns all moan about her singing in the abbey yet they moan through singing & not one of them asked for permission to go so. 

She could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl what a line I’m still not sure what a whirling dervish is a full 21 years after First watching the film.

They did realise they were going to get Maria back when they sent her away right they didn’t think this was going to be a constant fix that she would go to the Von traps & never return.

Also why does she insist she kisses the floor after an argument? She maybe a superior nun but what if she ends up being wrong.

I have confidence in sun shine is one of the moments my mum always goes on I want to go back to Austria as she walks past all the sights apparently in the wrong order tho.

The house she runs up the drive to has those huge two windows by the front door yet when she walks in & you see it from the inside there are no windows there… say what? you could get away with that then but not now.

The meeting of the captain, im sorry i see no love in her eyes when he blows that whistle for the first time none. Its pure fear, unless she likes being controlled & being all dominated (not 50 shades i hope) then there is no love there.

I love the fact that the kids are all mean to her its brilliant, when i first watched this i though they were going to be bad throughout and properly be mean to her. Im glad little Gretl stood up for herself & liked her. Kurt being encourage-able too thats fantastic. haha if only he really knew.

The spider & the pine cone brilliant tricks im sure i did the pine cone to someone in my life at some point im sure i have. Again at that point no love from the captain to maria shocking. Why mention that this is the moment he realises later on in the film hadnt they written that yet.

She properly goes at those kids doesnt she making them all cry & hurt their feelings. They did deserve it kinda but the ones who actually liked her didnt. I mean shed met them all once at this point. I know its touch love & setting you stall out at an early point, but still a little bit harsh agreed people.

i love the kids reaction to when dad says hes going away. it would be the same in todays world too. Really again?! but they are happy Uncle Max is coming round too, even though hes basically just a sponger.

I am 16 going on 17 is a really cute song to sing when your little & dont really know how the world will change a round you as a little girl, but now when i sing it,as an adult, i just think oh god that horrific, im not singing that anymore. & then sing it loud & proud like you do.

The dancing & jumping in the conservatory greenhouse thingy is still one of my favourite dance pieces in all of film. Its so romantic & lovely. & the fact that at the end of it he basically goes fuck it & Ralph full on kisses Liesl. It paid off lad well done all those dance lessons weren’t for nothing.

God bless whats his name brilliant. Good on her for getting everyone else though considering Maria had only been there for a couple of hours. & then the panic when Liesl mentions the spiders of opening her bed.

Also Liesls turn around in the time from you can jog on love we dont need you to well actually im now going to confide in you & become bffs is remarkable, i love how films make that jump so quickly & that disney take the piss out of it now.

I love the fact that all the girls are scared & joke that the boys wont be & then they are again, a very odd lot these kids just not all running to there governess straight away, who they’ve only just met. Do they not know about stranger danger?

Rain Drop on roses & whiskers on kittens… etc yes lets all get in bed & sing it yes yes yes brilliant. I also like the fact Maria says together expecting them all to sing at that point yet 12 hours later on a picnic they then all do weird lot these von traps arent they.

She makes there clothes out of curtains yes yes yes yes brilliant. They are all quite cool & hip now actually wouldnt look out of place in the middle of town on a friday night. I recon we could rock it.

Also had no one ever taken these kids on a day out ever before in there lives i mean come on even the eldest two must have done something like this before the rest of the kids arrived. I find that most odd.

Do Ray Me Far So La Te should have helped me learn how to sing when i was little but i think it had a detriment effect on me, as i cant sing at all. Well i do but ask the people stuck on the a27 with me trying to get home on any thursday they will tell you me singing latch by Sam Smith isnt the music they want to hear really. Also how had these kids never sung or heard a song before. They always mention that there mother liked to sing & dance so lets say shes been dead 4 years, anyone over the age of 7 would surely remember there mum singing along surely to god. I remember mama popcorn getting Michael Jacksons History when i was 3 at christmas & dancing & singing to in it in the lounge even though i didnt know the words. Come on film i know its the war but a house like that should have had a wireless at least.

Again back to mamas memorys of hitting the head doing the olympic start & walking up those steps like that. Im with her though id so do that too if i want. I mean you know sometimes you just gotta say when in Rome… opps wrong film.

When You Know The Notes To Sing

You Can Sing Most An y Thing

I love the CGI car ride back to the house this is when you fall in love with uncle Max, hes brilliant you understand straight away that hes a bit of a dell boy whos in it only for himself. If he was around today im sure someone would have some dodgy stuff on him. hes that kinda character if you get me. You know 3 strodles who has 3 strodles?

I love the fact he calls his children urchins when they are climbing the trees & then it hits him that its only his kids in the area, the whole oh god no moment covers his face.

We could do without that long chat about the governess being the captains saviour & bringing meaning too him. Although the after chat with max is quite cool where he wants the gossip. & then the kids turn up in that boat & they flip it over yes. Brilliant first impression, what away to go & this is what your missing in life, which is shown better about 5 minutes later when he actually realises. We will get to that though.

I love the dressing session it is too, Maria just goes for him full on telling to to stop & pay attention it so works & then the kids in the back ground (who are now all dry & not drowned in 3 seconds id like to point out) are not all singing & being brilliant examples of children. & there faces when he opens his mouth to sing thats so typical film, that would never happen in real life would it.

The high on a hill was a lonely goat heard, is funny but a little bit too over the top if you ask me. Yes its showing the skill but when the hell are they all going to use it again, & where did it go later on in the film.

Liesls does remember her Dad could sing & play therefore he starts Adelwiseing doesn’t he & all the other adults are shocked too. Cue mild flirting with Maria to begin the first time where there may actually be some affection to each other in the entire film not the other points that they mention it was later on in the film.

Then we get to the ball & saying that the men look beautiful haha thats brilliant good girl you tell em sister. Then theres that Dance, why didnt they just say it then & there that they loved each other its bleeding obvious now. Did it really just take one song two days & one dance to make them go to meh to full on Robin Thicke…maybe its a Disney film where you fall in love so quickly.

So Long Farewell, is one of the best songs in the entire film. We kept threatening our parents when we were little that we were going to get the whole family to do it. It never did materialise. Its bloody good those. Yes she should be allowed her first Champagne. Shes 17 give the girl a drink. The best bit though is when they all say goodbye & all the oldies downstairs sing goodbye back & wave, its hilarious & my favourite moment of the entire film. Love it when else in life would that happen.

Then the Baroness getting rid of Maria so she can marry the captain knowing that Maria is in love with him booooooooooo. You evil person booooo. I was going to say shes as bad as the Germans but nah she aint that bad.

Then an interval dafuq?!?!?!?! i like that though you dont get that any more with films do you. only plays.

I love the fact the kids all basically go into denial about life that Maria is left, they are having a new mum, they cant sing & they all become depressed. Then no visit of Maria or dinner as they are too late back to the house. Maybe they are like todays kids especially when all they want is a kiss on there finger to make it better& that strawberry are blue.

I usually fast forward Climb Every Mountain, i want Maria to get back to that house as quickly as she can & its a shite song. The sentiment is there but i dont need it sung that high pitched or as drawn out as it is. Shh love.

Then the Baroness leaves YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorry over excited about that. But she knows shes not going to win & basically tell him to go fuck Marias brains out (in a more 1930s way obviously, you know shes shipping them). Her list of wedding gifts shes going to give him though is good. Id like any of them please. I also like how she just goes back on her own with no chaperone, or uncle Max.

It doesnt take much for them to profess there love & get engaged straight away. Hes a man hore… going from one to another in half an hour. Oh well, at least it was nice of them to ask the children.

Now im not married but when or if i do get married as i walk down the isle i dont want a derogatory song about me to be played as i walk down the aisle. How do you solve a problem… nah no way mate. Also how did the nuns afford that dress?

I like the fact that they happen not return from honeymoon on the exact day of the concert, & the telegram & the Nazis how convenient is that… i know its a film i get it but sill. Poor Liesls though Ralph is now a man & off with the Germans. I like the fact that Gretel also asks why am i always last & the answer is because your the most important brilliant.

16 going on 17 reprise is nice a little odd that your step mums is tell you all that though isnt in when shes only just become your step mum. Also she didnt go & get her gifts straight away. Did they get to keep them or did they just stay in that house while they run away.

I love the fact the Germans all have to sit in that concert hall & watch the show brilliant. The way he says my fellow Austrians is brilliant. Its hilarious, its more funny then the woman constantly bowing & the guy who almost mucks up the line they’re gone, when they make a run for it. 

I love the fact that the Germans just assumed they ran to the nuns okay yes they did, but was anyone covering any other places where they may have gone like oh i dunno back home or the boarder or the baronesses. Nah none of them they all went to the nunnery.

Ralph you should have run off with them. Christopher Plumber trying to convince him is actually really good in this scene, its his best acting part in the entire film. Shame Ralph snitches on them though. Its all worth it though the nuns have killed there cars haha get in sisters.

& thats it they climb the mountain & get to Switzerland & no one dies from the family (well maybe uncle max for conspiring against the Germans) & thats the end.

& my fingers hurt.

I did say at the start there were no spoilers as we all know what happens, so sorry if you skipped that bit. Its a truly magical film & i plan on watching it with my own family for years to come once i have them. So please if you have 3 hours spare go relive the magic i’ve just typed about which has taken me forever to post. Trust me its worth it.