Hey man… there maybe, well, there will be spoilers just going to let you know that here before you start. & yes I am typing this with Korgs voice in my head, & you should of read it like that too, & if you dont, or havent, then that is very much your own fault. At least tell me, that you did that last bit in his voice, brov…
In normal voice now that means spoilers peoples.
welcome to the weirdness, the excitement & the world that introduced me to one of the best humans being to ever existed… Taika Waititi. & if you are clever enough to work out that I’ve now seen 3 Taika Dvd films in a row you will know that right now in 2019 we are full on loving the kiwi who is probably about to win an Oscar any time soon. Fingers crossed 53 days to go til JoJo. You know what this is now my aim to get this review up before I see JoJo Rabbit let’s see if I can type like a maniac shall we.
Some of you who are clever enough before you read this will now know that i have seen JoJo Rabbit not only 3 times in the cinema but once at home too, so my mission of doing this before the film came our failed epically.
Popcorn Synopsis for you all
Oh no Thors in a cage… but not for long. Surtur plans to unleash ragnarok on asgard & destroy it. Thor decapitates Surtur & takes out the majority of his minions before Skurge brings him back to Asgard. Skurge is now in control of the rainbow bridge as Heimdall committed treason but has ran away. Thor takes Surturs head to the asgard volt, only to realise that Odin is acting weirdly. Odin is actually Loki in disguise & is watching theatre & Thor revels this to the rest of his peoples. Loki decided to take Thor to earth to show him Odin is safe, however Loki disappears into a vortex. This is created by doctor strange, who helps Thor locate Odin & send the two of them there. Here Odin explains that he had a daughter before Thor who he imprisoned in his mind. Odin then passes away but not before telling the two of them that he loves them. The brothers attempt to battle there sister Hela, but she smashes Thors hammer. The two then try to get back to asgard but she throws them into the vortex of space at different times & arrives herself on asguard taking out the warriors three, the asgardian army & aligns herself as Skurge resurrecting her undead army from the past & wishes to conquer the nine realms. However the sword to the rainbow bridge has been stolen back by Heimdall who is busy protecting the hiding asgardians from Hela.
Thor after crash landing on Sakaar is taken prisoner & enslaved by the Grandmaster to do battle in his arena for entertainment, by a lady called valkyrie who used to be apart of a group of female asgardian warriors. Loki is also on Sakaar after landing there months before & is now in the Grandmasters inner circle. Thor promises to fight the grandmasters champion, but is advised not to by fellow slave Korg. Thor does take on the champion who is actually the hulk & the two battle. After the Grandmaster cheats so his champion will win Thor just about managers to fend off the hulk & also realises he can control lightning with his hands & not just his hammer.
Thor, now a joint champion, lives with Hulk & tries to convince the Hulk & valkyrie to join him, to get back to asgard, neither agree & thor breaks free on his own & finds the avenger jet hulk arrived in. Hulk starts to break the jet but a message from natasha reverts the hulk back to bruce banner, who has no idea where he is or that two years worth of time has passed since he last turned into the hulk. Thor manages to convince banner to join his team & Valkyrie too after she had a fight with Loki which triggered her memories of her last battle with Hela. Loki & Thor agree not to see each other anymore, before Loki attempts to sell him out. Thor for onces sees this coming & tricks Loki himself, before escaping with banner & valkyrie back to asgard to take on Hela after a chase around Sakaar.
Thor & Hela fight on asgard with Hela taking Thors eye & asking Thor what he was the god of again as her own power grows stronger. Thor then sees a vision of Odin who inspires him to unleash his power as his hammer was never the source of it. Thor unlocks his power & starts to attack Hela & her minions along with the people of asgard, Heimdall, Valkyrie, Hulk (now back as the Hulk) & loki after Korg saved him on Sakaar. The rest of the warriors from there are here too fighting with the people of asgard. Skurge sacrifices himself to save the people on Korgs ship, but Hela kills him. Thor then realises that this was never about stopping Ragnarok, it was about causing it to stop Hela. Loki goes to the vault to use the eternal flame to give life to Surtur, but does walk past the tesseract on his way. Surtur destroys the planet & Hela, with everyone from asgard safe on the ship. Loki & Thor make up & they decide to head to earth to set up a new home. Loki & Thor talk about how well the people of earth will take to Lokis return, but on discussing this a Titan war ship engulfs theres. The Grandmaster surrenders to the people of his planet & says he is happy to have been the reason the rebellion started.
Why would anyone be obsessed with this film after just re reading this. Its madness & mental & you seriously need to have your head checked out. But it works soooooooooooooooooooooooo much.
Before i properly get typing i need you all right now to go onto youtube (yep open another tab peoples) & type in Ragnarok Taika Waititi Commentary intro & just watch & listen & then get back to me & tell me that you a) laughed a lot & b) that you also do that when you see everything in the intro every time, its impossible not to.
I love how in the first like 10minutes of the film it goes you know the dark mysterious side that we had to the first two Thor films yeah were not doing that anymore. We’ve gone OTT & its all the improve now. Especially with that play. I love the fact the Loki has cast Matt Damon as him, The younger Luke Hemsworth (yes there are three of them) as Thor & Sam Neill as Odin, its brilliant. It really is some of the best camoes in cinema & is such a brilliant play & i want to see the whole thing. TAIKA LET ME SEE THE WHOLE PLAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love that so much of it was improve based on the original idea & that it all just happens. This is most noted with the behold my stuff bit. Its genuinely all the stuff they have all purchased or had on set while they made the film. Its brilliant & thats what makes Skurge so likeable even when hes the bad guy. Hes just loyal to the throne & when the rightful king returns that why he walks off. Karl Urban is great.
Hemsworth does deliver so much, this made him a much more dimensional hero than the other two films were. For all those years he didnt really want to be king of asgard but not theres a threat he knows what he has to do for the people & has to take his rightful place as king (oh god ive gone all lion king on this). He also gets most of the improvised bits too, which just help all the other characters move along so well, to help the relationships & it just becomes more organic & real.
The one bit thats not improvised & then becomes the most improvised is the lift scene, when Loki & Thor as going to get the Grandmasters ship. The first initial fight with the guards is cool & then the emotional heart to heart in the lift is so true & honest & everything you want there relationship to be & the writing of that is so beautiful. & then in falls into dessary with the whole lets do get help, which is one of the funniest sections in the MCU ever. Its properly brilliant. Spot the box ship in the background.
Why did Loki not know that the Hulk was on the planet & not the grand champion for the grandmaster. Hed been there a while. Does Hulk only turn up when its the big bucks like Brock Lesnar does? The friend from work is a nice line too, but the highlight is when hes try calm the hulk like natasha does & then he pummels him & Loki screams yes thats how it feels. When that happened in the cinema i did want to jump up & scream at the screen. We had been waiting a long time for that.
I love how they properly concentrate on Hulk being one person & Banner being another & properly discussing him as being BiPolar. Its really important for the film to do that & think that really brave to do this. To address mental health issues which arent just ptsd in a superhero films are never really done, but this & the other things that happen to Thor later on in the MCU are at the forefront as saying that our heros may wear capes & be able to save the world but they have issues too.
Why did those girls care about Thor turning up & wanting a selfie with him. LOKI IS FUCKING RIGHT NEXT TO HIM!!!!!! I know i would probably if given the chance would never let go of Hiddleston if i ever met him, but come on the mans looking surave in his Goochi.
Any film that gives you Cumberbatch Hiddleston & Hemsworth in the same room works for me on soooooooooooooo many levels. Oh man. Also can we i ask are we sure Thors not the adopted one? All the rest of them look & sound the same & do there blades in the same manner. Loki is not the adopted one. Also why (okay shes evil) but why keep that you have a sister secret?
Jeff Goldblum. oh Jeff. He was basically told be the Goldblum we all know & love & turn up so we can dye your beard blue. Its the most Goldblum hes ever been it really is & i love it. So mental & crazy & you just think yes.
The use of music (especially the immigrant song) & the techno 80s feel is fabulous. It works due to the wacky ness of it. I mean the whole its my birthday fireworks on the orgy ship is brilliant, awkward but fantastic it saves them all though. The most beautiful image is when Thor lands on the rainbow bridge in slow mo with all the lightning going off & immigrant song is playing. Seriously if you dont have goosebumps after that this film isnt for you. Taika earnt his money on that shot alone.
Okay ive got to address Korg havent i… AHHHHHHHH fucking love that pile of rocks. Hes got some epic line. I genuinely love going around to people now going hey man… its one of my favourite things to do. That will be what my opening words would ever be to Taika if i met him. I love the shadows reference thats brilliant & i would so join that revolution with him, pamphlets or not. Taika that was brilliant thing for you to do & create. Well done.
Oh god ive not even mentioned Cate Blanchett yet who just nails being the baddie. I mean as much as shes only in this one & Ragnarok destroys her & Asgard, shes bloody brilliant & scary in this. & so empowering as well, when she grows her antlers ( they are antlers right). If you want an evil baddies as a woman get her.
Loki on the ship screaming your saviour is here i bloody love that.
I love how at the end Loki & Thor do reconcile. The love HAte relationship is fully repaired at the end, it makes what comes afterwards so much worse & painful as well.
& im going to stop there otherwise i will just review every single second of this film, main because that is what heros do (gets hit in the face by a ball).
Basically like me this is the best & calmest way to start your Taika Waititi watching people. Hes been given a budget & gone mad. Its not his best work but it is still the best Thor film & one of the best films in the MCU just because its got the balls to go hay weve just changed everything you thought you knew about this series.
ITs a proper acid trip that works on so many levels & sets everything nicely up for infinity war. Get on the Rainbow bridge people. The revolution of Taika Waititi has begun…